You never know who you are going to meet in this world....

It was just another evening out to dinner to relax and chat with my spouse and with the wonderful staff and patrons at our local watering hole.  Both J and I love the ambiance and coziness of the atmosphere and the plethora of widely varied personalities we have been privileged to get to know.  It's refreshing to know that we are not all clones of each other and that we each bring perspective that can enrich each other's lives if we simply choose to allow ourselves to be open minded.

Celebrating our differences helps us all to realize just how unique we each are in the world.  Being unique often coincides with having unique perspectives and views.... and with that gift, comes new ways to look at the world around us and to consider.

Take for instance this friend I met.  She was a gift to our waitress by one of the patrons who frequents the restaurant.  Our waitress is positively unique in many ways, with one of her attributes being that she enjoys collecting mannequins.  Certainly, one can have all sorts of enterprising fun with roomful of them.... posing them on the lawn for Halloween or perhaps setting up a staged photographic period shoot as has been done.  I'd personally like to see Max Headroom in the entourage with his 1980's striped shirts and opaque, black glasses...   As for this one...  she had no name as of that night, but I thought of one for her later.....

It may seem like I'm rambling here, but yet really, I'm heading somewhere with all of this.

J and I were in conversation amongst the patrons when we were, at some point late in the evening, introduced to one of the other waitresses.  We had seen her before but had never had the chance to meet.  After chatting for a while, I somehow segwayed into the realm of my own status as a transgender woman.  I don't make a point of coming out to everyone, but I also know when I am comfortable enough in an environment to know when someone else knows.  I mean really, after a couple of glasses of wine, it is, after all, theoretically possible that I may just slip into a barritone voice every now and then.... isn't it?

Well, one thing led to another and soon enough I came to realize that there was some positive in not trying to be or play the undercover stealth woman role.   It turns out that in my talking about myself and my own situation, I learned that the woman we were speaking with also worked within a school system where she was aware of two children who were, themselves, transgender.   Both of them were girls who felt out of sorts in the gender role they were born into.  She explained how they were being bullied by the other children in the school for their differences and in her facial expressions, I could sense that she felt great concern for their situation.

We ended up discussing with her, some of my own experiences growing up, all the while trying to relate to the issues these children were likely facing as well.  I was able to provide some perspectives, thoughts and possible ideas for direction that might have benefit, I hope, for them.

Being stealth as transgender is something I wish we did not have to always consider in this world.  Just as I see diversity in so many other aspects of society (and in our favorite restaurant's staff and patrons), so I see it within those who are transgender.  By being able to celebrate openly who we are, we can effect positive change in subtle ways that can make a difference in someone's life perhaps... someone we may have never had the opportunity to benefit if we were unseen and unheard.

Maybe I do make a difference in some small way.  I know if I can fully be and express who I am, that I can make a positive contribution to someone's life... even a small one as it may be.  And that's enough for me to wake up to a new day, each day.

Be the change you wish to see in life.....

I just hope mine is not all in pennies!

Finally....  a couple of other odd pictures from that evening....   


  1. great post Christen i think after awhile if we all continue to meet the world half way in our attempt to blend in with the gg's around us eventually those around us will say oh that's just my neighbor or thats my inlaw hence treating us as anyone else they know ( when they are speaking to others). and as a GG friend says being transgendered doesn't make one nice and it doesn't make one mean it is just another piece of who we are like a diff hair color. as i have come out to neighbors and famialy in the previous year i am surprised at how accepting they have been especially when i show them a photo of me in a conservative outfit. also the reverse is true when i am out as diana gg's sometimes refuse to believe that i am not a gg. but the world in general is evolving not just us in the transgendered world. day one step at a time as more professionals come out it has helped in our acceptence.
    again a great blog entry


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