The Woman Within

How can so many smiling pictures I post not even come close to portraying what hurt and sadness and betrayal I feel inside?  It truly amazes me how well I have learned over the years and decades to bury these feelings so well.  Yet still, I am unable to forever hide this pain and these thoughts from my self.  This post is one which will be different from the many you may have read.  I truly do not like to vent my sadness or my hurt and would rather choose to post only the bright and positive and of the good of things to come.  But the weight that has been hiding and lurking within is becoming more and more omnipresent in my conscious thoughts by day and my agitated lucid dreams by night. My mom passed away a horrible death from dementia in January... something I blogged about in this link here . It was the end to many of the dark secrets and  more dark secrets I had written about and hoped were put firmly behind me.  Yet the box of Pandora is rarel...

A good friend posted today, a link to a blog of a man dieing of colorectal cancer.  He was an entrepeneur, a father, husband, musician and many more things.  He was 41 when he died.  He died on May 4, 2011 and he wrote his own epitaph in his blog on that day.  He gave thanks to his ability to be able to share his world with others and to be graced by a loving family.  He gave thanks for being able to be a meaningful part of this world to which he contributed much.  I was so impressed and humbled to read it and it gave me pause for reflection.  Here is the link... https://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.penmachine.com%2F2011%2F05%2Fthe-last-post&h=95366 I see so many who complain and whine over the trivialities in life.  Trivial in comparison to the great equalizer which awaits us all… death.  Trivialities which consume so many and yield only negative energies and wasted time.  In the transgender world, I see s...